Day 53 Dat Ass....Ugh.

This will be shorter than yesterday!  I need to go volunteer at my daughter's choir performance.  I am "snack table" lady.  I will be selling candy, chips, and water.  Seriously.  I'm not even kidding.  CHIPS, mother fucker, CHIPS.  Ugh.  And I have to be near strangers.....and make small talk.  And I think a lot of these choir parents are super religious.  FUCK!  I have to watch my language and pretend I'm an upstanding member of society.

See?  Chips LOVE me!!

If you ever walk around all day, and you feel pretty good about yourself...I have a quick solution to that nonsense.  GO bathing suit shopping.  Seriously that will set you straight from being all "proud of your body".

Today I went into Target all......yeah, bitches, I'm gonna get me a bathing suit!  Then I tried a few on.   Front view-not bad (abs still a disappointment but I can work with it).  Side view-not bad.  Upper back-I like it.  Ass and Muffin Tops-OH HOLY HELL.  WHAT THE FUCK HAVE I BEEN DOING?  IT'S A FUCKING MESS.  Not even a hot mess....just a sloppy mess.

First challenge-I'm going to reach my goal (didn't happen)
Second challenge-I'm FINALLY going to reach my goal (not quite)
Third challenge-I'm going to meet my goal..........outlook not positive.

Apparently this is not happening in my lifetime.  Fucking booooooooooooooooooooo!

So I bought two suits anyway and on the way home I contemplated going home and burying my face in some fucking Nutella.  After 14 long, mother fucking months, my ass is still a nightmare.  Flabby, bumpy and LARGE.  What is the point of all this denial and "self control" when my rear is still gross??????  I might have PTSD from looking at that shit.  Fo' reals.

My face when I looked at my big ass.  So I live to SQUAT another day.  Fuck stupid squats.  I'm just going to tan that shit and pretend!

OK, meals for today.
Breakfast-Protein Bistro Box from Starbucks (minus that nasty bread hockey puck thingy) 320
Snack-Quest Bar-Vanilla Almond 180
Lunch-Wolf Creek  plain chicken breast, side of broccoli 240
Snack- apple, protein shake 230
Dinner- turkey taco meat, whole wheat, low carb tortilla (AKA nasty piece of shit) 305
Total: 1,317

I might have another snack later.  I dunno.  I didn't go to the gym today.  Rest day.

Tomorrow I will be back at it.  Pffffffffffft. 

My word to describe you is fan-fucking-tastic!  Boom!