I didn't get up to workout this morning because I was up from 1:00-3:30. I should have just gotten up at 4:00 to go do my workout. Today we have tons of shit to do/errands to run, so apparently it's my "rest day".
I need to meditate (bahahahahahahaaaaa. I would be able to sit still to save my fucking life), change my attitude, and suck it the fuck up. I'm thinking...
1. I fucking HATE worrying about every fucking thing going into my mouth (no blow job jokes today, friends).
2. I'm tired of starting over because I keep giving up and lacking discipline.
3. What makes me think that I'll finally be able to keep the weight off THIS time?
4. I was SO HAPPY and proud a few short months ago. AND now I'm just...NOT.
5. I'm stressing about my before/after photos and dunks because I have my bikini photo up, and it's HUGE, on the wall of my gym AND I don't fucking look like that anymore and it's EMBARRASSING!
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| Today I need 10. |
So yeah, now you get to meet "Pissy Andi". Fuck it. Drink my water, eat clean, and ride the mood.
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| Ahahahahahahaha! |
And just so YOU know, I KNOW that these are all "first world problems". We are, in fact, talking about 15 pounds. I am not, in fact, starting over (I'd have to gain 35 more pounds for that). I do, in fact, have a loving husband who really doesn't give a fuck what I weigh. I am, in fact, really lucky to have my family, a job, and a roof over my head. I get all this, I do.
First. World. Problems.
Sometimes I look at people who have no OCD, ADD, A type personality/perfectionist leanings and I think..........FUUUUUUUUCK YOOOOOOU! Harumph! Poor me rant over. Time to SUCK IT UP!
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| Das right! |
Oh well, pimpin' ain't easy but it's necessary...
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